I've not know you for very long... but i treasure the moment with you. I don't know what to say. Though my time with you is short but i really treasure it. Maybe you don't but i do... No matter what you say me i will not be angry. Even if you make me angry. I know my relationship with you is no better than you n him. For now i don't want to care anything. I'm really sick and tired of it. Don't really feel well... It's only a thinking of mine.. I'll always be around by your side praying for u..

i saw sth that i dun wish to see... haiz ~ it makes me feel sad n jealous of it..suan le. For me i dun have e reason to be sad, happy or even jealous... coz a failure is juz a failure... since i got to noe u. i oni cause misery to u... nth but misery.. i dun noe how to make u happy.. even if i did so wat?!?! haiz... i'm juz so useless. forget it.. since i got to noe u, ur hp bills increase hai u have to dun eat den have stomach cramps.. i shld not have noe u den i will not cause u to have all tis problems... den u go home late oso kanna scolded by ur parents.. i dun mind u vent ur anger on me... i dun mind u ask me questions for hmwrk.. in fact i dun mind aniting... aiya... wat am i doing? come here n tok cock... wtf!

[29/01/05]
Yesterday went to play badminton... Actually nth much to say lar. Only tt Agnes went for flag day then she say she very tired so she dun wan to play badminton. After tt send her hm den i oso headed hm le...

[30/01/05]
The last day of January... What had i achieve so far? Let me think... Hmm.. my answer is nth. Now blogging at ym's house. Had to do sth tt i've plan this month... Haha at last i've finished it. Hee~ But i not sure whether to give it to that someone or not... Haiz now that someone is sick... tt person is having headache. i can't do anything but just to pray hard for her that she will get well soon..

*missin you*

[27/01/05]
School was normal... went back to xms and help out a bit on drawing the section tee shirt. Then went to buy carrot cake for dinner. Haha... had my dinner at ym's hse with peggy and of coz ym too. Then agnes came.. Woah! she ate a lot man... haha. Can't imagine it right? Then after dinner i taught her p.o.a... Reached home at 11 plus.. I enjoyed my day with her... haha. Very funny. Oh ya Agnes don't think i'm serious then don't ask me hor... sometimes a person will get serious.

[28/01/05]
haha... today school was fun... there was a performance in the morning till 9 a.m. Got people sang tong kuai and ONE NIGHT IN BEIJING... Whaha! We proceeded back to classroom. Then 1st Shaiful came out and sang i dream followed by eskae, xiao ling n yan zhen re dai yu ling. Now having IT lesson... Going to have lunch soon. Yeah! haha... Well.. gtg. bye

Haha... i'm back here to blog again..now having IT lesson. So boring!!! Oh ya having fever and flu now.. feel like resting at home. But i can't miss any lessons. If i miss any of the lessons i think i will not able to catch up. Yesterday after school went back to xms. By the time i reach there was about 3 pm plus. Before there i went to someone's house. Reached somewhere outside band room i saw a pocket trumpet. And what i did was to borrow from that person who's holding it and play. Haha i think the normal B flat trumpet is better than pocket trumpet. Though pocket trumpet looks cuter. Lolx... Well got to stop here and back to lesson... Bye~

Yesterday sms with someone at night. Think there's lot of things we don't know about each other. From my point of view, sometimes the person maybe a total stranger to me but sometimes not... Haha.. I don't understand why sometimes i will miss that person or dream about that person...Well shall stop here.. lazy to type anymore.

[22/01/05]
Was havin fever... because of yesterday tt we went to punggol beach. Haha den in e afternoon went for badminton. Was not on good condition. This time round daniel came. Haha. sianz... he's very good in playing badminton. Hm.. overall was ok. Haha.. Reached home at about 11 plus...
[23/01/05]
Went to hougang mall with ym to buy sth... Den we headed to peggy's hse... thr's me, agnes, ym n peggy... rotted at her hse n have dinner. Today was quite fun for me.. but when i headed home... i was not myself again... Haiz tink someone noes wat i'm saying... yar..

[24/01/05]
Today was ok lar... havin biz com now ... secretly usin e com now to blog... haha... tink my com will not be ok so soon...

Now blogging at winson hse... Haiz not tt winson hse is sianz but i really feel sianz... not really feel sianz oso feel like crying... Y am i always crying? i'm so weak man! haiz.. Why did my mum let me come into tis world? i'm really a very pess person. When i come into this world all i noe is to cry till now i oso crying... so useless of me. haiz.. a failure bound to be a failure forever! i've watched ultraman today... saw one phrase when it's ending... zhui qiu ni de meng xiang, yi qie dou hui bu yi yang.. really? i dun tink tis sentence apply on me.. Coz i'm juz a useless person hu fails everytime in my life time. No matter in wat... even if it's not studies i juz fail.. What am i? A idiotic who came into tis stupid world of mine...

I don't know why i'm gettin sad and miserable nowadays. Haiz.. Nothin can save me from this stupid thinkin of mine. Lots of things had been whirling in my mind. I will not say out what's troubling me. I will suffer alone at a corner. Sometimes thing shall not be mention.. Haiz.. Why am i like that? Only two persons cause my to be like that.. Well forget about it.. Shall not talk about it anymore.

I'm posting now in sch... sianz. now havin biz com. Tt teacher tok n tok non-stop. Toking rot. Don' even link to the module. What e. Had received my time table for tml. Sianz a long day for me lor. 8 am to 5.15 pm... wish to end sch now, den i can go home.

I think i'm really bad at consoling people. I don't know how to do that. I really want to console him/her. But i think i'm really a useless one. Such a simple thing i also can't do it. Might as well die off. Don't waste the source of my parents... I'm a person who does not worth any care and concern from other people. I'm a total failure. I really don't know what to say now. For a useless person to blog here and saying useless things. ='( I've tried very hard to control myself not to be that me in that past. Now i'm controlling my temper and all that... but i'm still useless!

Today school was normal.. nothing much happen~ Hmmm... someone who had been reading my blog don't seem to fathom what i'm trying to say. Well hope on V.Day i will be able to meet up someone. But maybe i will not meet tt person maybe yes... i don't know. Oh ya today my account teacher gave a surprise test... hai wo so gan chiong... whaha some more i din revise my wrk so anyhow do... whaha!

Is a testimonial very important to me? Why am i keep bothering about it? I'm mad!
Why do this matter keep bothering about me? Or should i say i've think too much? Well forget about it...

I'm damn sad now. I can't tell the reason out. I will keep it in my heart and just let myself to be sad till i die. I tell myself not to let any tears flow out of my eyes but i can't do it. Today my mood is damn bad. Is it because of what i'm thinking about this few days? All i have to say i know i'm sad, i'm stress, i'm not happy at all times!!!

Now i'm secretly using e sch com to post. Haha dunno wat to say too. Well it was boring for me when my com was down. So scared of being scold by teacher. Sunday was a boring day for me but luckily i have Agnes to chat with me... If not i would have bored to death le... haha! Then watched some tv programmes , sleep again.

Today i slept till 12 pm plus... Oh ya i mentioned it earlier on le. Then after that had my breakfast cum lunch at 1 pm plus. I only had 2 pieces of roti prata n one cup of milo. Then online and chat with winson n ym... den i met up wif ym earlier den e meeting time of 5.30 pm... coz we both were too bored at home! lolX Went to Hougang Mall n Hougang Point to have a walk. By then it was time for us to play badminton le. Yeah!!! Proceeded to cy's hse thr de badminton court oni yiang shan was thr.. haha so ke lian. cy n gz say they will be late. guess wat? cy was e lastest... haha... today thr's agnes, peggy, siew yuen, yiang shan, cc, ray, yb, cy, ym, ys, gz, zh n me! haha... today was quite a gd one but i tink my wrist is a bit pain... tink cc went home 1st den followed by siew yuen den yiang shan... can't remembered so clearly le. Then after tt me n peggy sent agnes home... on e way sth funny happen... whaha! then peggy went hm n 11.. n followed by e rest of us... tink everyone of us r tired... especially yee sin! maybe bcoz b4 playing badminton she's wrking on her project. can't blame her coz it's human nature. haha... tink tt's all for today le bah...

WOah came hm i saw my com was working. Wat e!!! haha... i was so happy. Then i online till one am plus. I can't stand it anymore i went to sleep. For one week plus i had not have a good sleep for very long le. Today woke up at 12 pm plus tink it was my longest sleep for tis week plus le. now feel energetic le. lolX... yesterday at ray's hse play ps1 keep losing... act is not me lousy is e controller got prob! haha so winson dun say i lousy le hor! yesterday they were watching white chicks but i did not watch. i'm alone in ray's room staring into blank. Dunno for wat reason i was not very down. starting to become sad. n i felt like going home at that moment. Then ray came in we play poker cards... n listen to songs. After that we play ps1 very shiok siax... then agnes came in... followed by lots of ppl le. haha...to me

I'm here. yeah so happy today is friday le. no nid to suffer frm having lesson in sch. when i'm having holidays i'm thinking of starting sch but now... sch had started i regretted having tt idea in my mind. today had biz statistic lesson it was so boring tt i yawned in class. went to band and now i'm at ray's hse. whaha~ gg to watch white chicks n saw i tink. sianz... tis year for account... gg to learn those topics tt i dun understand. E most ma fan de is trading, profit n loss a/c got vertical n horizontal format. wat e... do i feel sianz when toking to agnes on phone everyday? i have no ans to it but i tink e ans is no. coz i really dun feel sianz. whaha! well tink tt's e end for today. bye!!! oh ya zhi hao if u happen to read my blog, be happy worx! smilez always!!! i will always be thr for u!!! =)

me & wailing2

me n wailing

Haiz today actually end sch at 6.15 pm de but in the end i released at 3.15 pm... haha i'm so happy. Then message tt agnes. she hor blur blur de.. but blur de cute... haha. well very tired shall stop here.

Today was first day of school. I was so shocked when i've received my timetable. And i said WTH!!! cause it's like very long hours on tuesday. Nvm after that went to Ym's hse to watch chucky... agnes, gz, me, cy, peggy, winson, sy. haha got to see someone i miss. lolX then things happened lar. can't say much here. good things shld be kept in my mind... to make wonderful memories for me...

Why do we have emotions? Why will we miss ppl? Why? Why? It's torturing me when i miss someone. It really does~ Sometimes it really pain till you can feel that ur heart is tearing into two pieces. What e hell man! Suan le i will try to control my feelings de. But i'm not sure whether i can do it. Coz tis kind of ting is diff to control. sObx²

For such a long time at last i can blog le... i'm so glad...
To Her:
Haiz~ I miss u so much. Think u noe for urself hu r u... Can't see u so often oso... i noe i'm not e most imprt in r heart. thr's someone else more imprt in ur heart. u noe hu rite??? i shall not mention much here. When u r sad turn to me k? dun always argue wif ur bro. learn to relax. act got lots of tings to tell u de. maybe nxt time den i say to u bah. hope u will understand wat i'm trying to tell u.

To Him:
Another person to say do u noe i still like u? or u juz dun bother to noe... suan le. no matter wat happen to u i will juz wish u to be happy. whenever u r sad u can turn to me i will always be thr for u. i juz wan u to be happy... though u may not mention abt me here n thr, but u will always be in my heart. It breaks my heart when i see u so sad. And i dunno how to console u. suan le maybe u dun even nid it coz got other ppl console u can le... i will stay at a side quietly pray happiness for u.

[08/01/05]
Actually at 5.30 p.m cy, gz, zh, ym, winson, peggy, ray plan to play bball de. but bcoz of e weather we've to cancel it. Later at 5.30 p.m again gz called me. She asked me whether iwant to play badminton. I replied it's fine wif me de. Later we all met at e badminton hall thr... everyone was late including me. lolX. when i reached thr winson told me e court is oni available frm 9 to 10 p.m... woah tt was late rite.. den we planned to have our dinner 1st. AT macdonald... den went to a badminton court tt is juz beside xms... play till abt 11 plus p.m den we went home. it was so tiring siax...

Sec sch had started their sch le... so sianz... haiz. time had passed & i think when day passed that someone will not call me & sms me le... haha.... sianz.. when my sch reopens i wonder what will be my sch life like. So sad i will miss my buddies. now blogging at ym' s house cause my com spoil again. one will miss me i will oso miss u de.. haha u shld noe hu u r lar... ok.

Listening to The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack now... feel like crying. thinking of the past & the present sad things. Still can remembered the night outside ceyao's house when someone said something and made me very depressed. Tian AR must i suffered so much? Sometimes my heart really very pains. It's very painful. REALLY!!! To get over it i need weeks to do so. why am i so depressed everytime?

Why do i like a person? Why? Haiz... It makes me very xin ku. I mean very to the power of infinity. REally! Lots of things were in my head somethings i just can't say it out. Some ppl i can like i can't like. And i'm always forget about by others. Haiz. What the hell with it?!? If i'm dead i will not be brooding over about all these stupid things. But i'm really glad to have e buddies around me... n my godsis! If without i already comitted suicide le. Thanks alot my buddies!!! This is the 2nd day on new year le i should be thinking of another way... I must achieve my aim!

-=evonne=- my idol

Should i be angry with someone over a small matter? HmMm... think better not. Not worth it! I'm so scared that one day i can't tolerate it and just flared it out. Haiz. Why? I should not think about this. I really don't want to lose someone. But for me to tolerate a person it's really a mircale. That person that i can tolerate so well must be very fortunate. Forget it dont' want to mention it. F**king hell why am i always not remembered by others? Am is so irritating??? And i'm always the last even if they remember me... Haiz. Haiz. Haiz

Yesterday went to Ceyao hse. Actually plan to watch vcd but in the end i'm playing computer. Whaha! After that we went to have our dinner at the coffeeshop. OMG! tt coffeeshop again. We proceed to yao ming's house coz kah siang was not at home. By then Daniel came. haha Went to kovan to have supper n i'm back home... it's 3 plus... i'm so tired. Oh Ya~

me n dian 2

me n winson2

me n zh4

me n cy2

me n ym2

me n gz4

me n gz3

me n gz2

me n gz

me n zh3

me n cy 2

me n ym

yong bin n me

me n winson

me n ray 2

me n ray

me n zh3

me n dian

me n zh2

me n zh

me n cy